Leicester City Make Audacious Approach For Alan Partridge
Leicester City confirmed they have made an audacious approach to install Alan Partridge as new head coach of the struggling club because his name sounds like a football manager.
A club insider confirmed the Norwich radio morning presenter was, despite being fictional and out of work for some time, just the tonic the club required.
‘We need someone who represents everything the club’s about. Incompetence, confusion and someone painfully out of their depth. Plus I love that 1970s early 1980s comb-over; it’s just what the club needs.’
‘He knows the media. We need someone who can navigate their way around the English game, especially the roads that will lead this club to our destination; Stoke, Hull or Burnley. He’ll be able to take us the quickest way via B-roads and avoid traffic hot spots.
Despite Partridge not being a football fan or understanding the basic rules of the game, his suitors don’t think this will necessarily hold him back. Fans at first speechless have started to get behind a manager with a name that sounds like an English football manager.
Dave Rushton, Foxes fan chairman said ‘The players were all too spoiled. Winning the EPL title was the worst thing that could’ve happened. What we required was mid-table mediocrity. It’s completely gone to their heads. Partridge will have the players in Travelodges instead of the Hilton. Motorway service stations instead of Claridges. We’re right behind this back to basics approach. We need someone English, with a name that sounds like an English football manager, out of touch, someone who represents the absurdity of the modern game and will appear gormless each week on Match of the Day.’